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After the christening of his baby brother
in church, little Johnny sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the
car. His father asked him three times what was wrong.
Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a
Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
Terri asked her Sunday School class to
draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's
picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which
story it was meant to represent. "The flight to Egypt," said Kyle.
"I see ... And that must be Mary, Joseph,
andBaby Jesus,"Ms. Terri said. "But who's the fourth person?" "Oh, that's
Pontius -- the Pilot!"
The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you say
prayers before eating?" "No sir," Little Johnny replies, "I don't have to,
my mom is a good cook!"
A college drama group presented a play in which one character would stand on
a trapdoor and announce, "I descend into hell!" A stagehand below would then
pull a rope, the trapdoor would open, and the character would plunge
through. The play was well received. When the actor playing the part became
ill, another actor who was quite overweight took his place. When the new
actor announced, "I descend into hell!" the stagehand pulled the rope, and
the actor began his plunge, but became hopelessly stuck. No amount of
tugging on the rope could make him descend. One student in
the balcony jumped up and yelled:
"Hallelujah! Hell is full!"

Pastor Dave Charlton tells us, "After a worship service at First Baptist
in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a fidgety seven-year-old boy told me
she finally got her son to sit still and be
quiet. About halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered,
'If you don't be quiet, Pastor Charlton is going to lose
his place and will have to start his
sermon all over again!' It worked."
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